Consistency

 Consistent means: showing consistency; not self-contradictory

Consistency is a big word around Colby's Family.  It is an especially big word for Mom and Dad.  It is hard to be consistent.  I know that it is hard not to just throw your hands up and say, "WHATEVER!"  I, also, know that with summer coming on, consistency is going to be even harder!

We have made the decision that even though school will be out, we need to stay consistent with bed times, bath times, schedules, and every other rule.  We do not want Colby to regress during the summer.  Actually, I am hoping that this summer will be one of progress for Colby's family.

SO HERE IS TO SOME MAJOR

"Not All Superheroes Wear Capes"

That is right; we don't all wear capes.  I don't think of myself as a Super Hero.  I am just MOM.  I am a mom who loves her children.  I am a "Work From Home" mom.  I am a "Love to Cook" kind of mom.  I am a "Break Up Fights" kind of mom.  I am a "Kiss Away Tears and Pain" kind of mom.  I am a home-schooling mom.  I am a "Calm Colby Down" kind of mom.  I am a "Lock Myself in the Bathroom and Cry because I am not sure what else to do" kind of mom.  And I am many more kinds of mom.  I am far from perfect.  I lose my cool sometimes.  I do all that I can possibly do.  And I have to admit, that it hurt my feelings when people who don't live here and can not possibly know what all we do all day, call me lazy.  I challenge anyone to come and do what I do for 1 day!

Patience...

There is this Turkish proverb that I came across today and thought that it is very fitting in the lives that are Colby's Family.

"Patience is the key to paradise"

Now, I know that it is REALLY hard to be patient at times, but I have noticed that when we are not patient with Colby, he acts worse.  When we are patient, talk in a calm voice, even when he is screaming, and we remain calm, Colby does MUCH better.  I know that this is easier said than done.  We, sometimes, lose our cool as well. 

I hope you all have a wonderful day!

Colby (From Dad)

It has been an interesting week, filled with ups and downs.  We had Colby by ourselves this weekend (with Will) as his sisters and Nick went to see their Pop.  I thought Colby would take it hard, but we had a pretty good weekend.  He actually watched me cut the grass (which is a big improvement from screaming and hiding like he did in the past), he helped us clean and we took him to Chic-Fil-A on Saturday.  We took him to see his doctor on Thursday and she prescribed him some new medicine.  Other than insomnia, the medicine seems to be taking effect quite nicely.

My only concern was that at different times during this past week, Colby has been very upset when I have left.  He says that "Daddy has run away and won't come back".  This is troubling because I want Colby to know that I will always come back.  It has gotten better, and hopefully it will continue.

We had a good morning this morning, so here's to hoping we have a great week!

So Far, So Good - And a Note on Bad Behavior

We have had a good weekend...Well, a good weekend the the "Colby's Family Book"!  We had a few minor incidents with Colby, but really, nothing major.  We will see how today (Sunday) goes.

Mom's Note on Behavior:
On Saturdays, if Colby has had a good week, we take him to a fast food place. This week's choice-CHICK-FIL-A!  Now, I am not judging how other parents choose to parent their children, but there was this child (a boy about 4) in Chick-Fil-A throwing a fit for ice cream.  "I WANT ICE CREAM"-He was screaming.  Dad asked me if there was something wrong with the child, and I said, "I don't know, but the parents let him go play on the play ground area while they ate in the dining room."  God above knows that I am not the perfect parent, but fit-throwing is one thing that I do not allow.  Colby (and the others) have thrown fits in public, but we gather up our stuff and leave.  Above all else, they do not get the treat (such as ice cream).

I know that it is sometimes hard to tell your child, especially when they do have a disability like Autism.
I know that it is easier to just give in to the temptation of giving the child his/her way just so they don't scream, cry, throw a fit, lash out, hit, bite, kick, and the list could go on.
I admit that I have given in more times than I should have.  BUT, I have also learned, on this long journey that is being a part of "Colby's Family", that giving in ONLY condones the bad behavior.  It makes the child think that it is OK to act that way.  We (mom and dad) have learned that, even though it may be easier to throw up our hands and say, "Whatever", it is not helping Colby become the person he can become.

Playing Hooky

If you want to call it that.  I am calling it, "Mom is being nice to the teachers".  Dad had to take Willie to the ER because he can not keep stuff out of his ears.  And a new development has occurred with Colby: HE FLIPS OUT EVERY TIME DAD LEAVES!!!!!  He asks non-stop about "when's dad coming home?"  He cries and says, "Dad ran away!"  Complete and total meltdown mode is what I am talking about.  It lasts the entire time Dad is gone.  So, I thought that today would be a good day for us to play hooky!

And Our Summer is Getting Busier!!!!

Just when I thought we could jam absolutely nothing else into June, we did!!!  Yesterday, we added 2 more appointments to our already busy month that will be called June 2011.

The appointment with Dr. Hollis went quickly.  Let me rephrase that...the time we actually saw Dr. Hollis was quick, but we had to sit in the dreary waiting room for far too long.  Colby did well though considering.  I gave him a dollar and told him that he could get something from the vending machines after we saw the Dr. 

I think Dr. Hollis got annoyed with me because I took Colby off the meds he was on, but seriously, if they don't do anything, there is no need to keep him on a medication.  I am semi-anti-medication.  I am willing to give Colby a medicine that will work, and I willing to give it a month to see if we see any benefits.  After a month with no benefits, I am taking him off.  In my opinion, if a medicine does not work within a month, IT IS NOT GOING TO WORK! 

So, we are now trying a new medication.  I will post more on that some other time.  I hope you all have a wonderful day!

Back to Centerstone

Today, we are going back to see Dr. Hollis at Centerstone.  It is not my most favorite place to go.  And I will be honest, it is the way it looks.  Inside, in the waiting, there is nothing but chairs and a small lego table.  I know they service both adults as well as children, and that may be good for the future, but I wish it were bright and they had more toys or something.   It is just drab and dreary. 

Well, I hope you all have a great day!

What I know now...

...That I wish I knew then???   I wish I had known of this place! 

The Brown Center for Autism  would have been a cool place for Colby when he was little.  They have both morning and afternoon classes as well as an all day class.  Unfortunately, they only serve up to 5 years, so Colby is too old, but boy, would it have been cool! 

Good Days and Bad Ones

Sure, Colby's Family has good as well as bad days, and yesterday was a good one in our book. 

We have started a new rule in our house: 1 hour of TV per night during the week, and they can earn extra minutes.  Let me rephrase that: 1 hour of TV in the living room per weekday night.  Colby can have his TV in his room for more than 1 hour.  Today when Colby's hour was up, we turned the TV off, and we had a small incident, but Colby did recover quickly ( after about 10 minutes), and went on outside to play.  So, this constitutes a good day in Colby's family.  While he did get slightly aggressive with me (MOM), it did not last.  So, yeah it was a good day! 

PS-On a side note, My desk got cleared off so Colby can plug in the "white one"! 

From Bad to Worse...

...That is how our night went.  And it had nothing to do with the keyboard, or at least from our standpoint. 

We had a bad evening.  It started when it was the girls turn to watch their show.  He screamed, threw things, etc, and then Mom and Dad finally turned off the TV and let the girls go to our room to watch their show.  Colby then took a kazoo away from Will, and instead of giving it back he threw it across the room.  So, I (mom) took the kazoo and put it away.  That meant FULL BLOWN MELTDOWN!!!!  Colby is screaming, Dad is screaming, and Mom is about to go into her own meltdown mode, so I decided that I needed to defuse the situation.  By defuse, I mean-Colby has to go to his room and lay in his bed.  It took a while to get him into his PJ's and down the stairs into his room, but we did it.  All was calm for about 10 minutes.  Colby then tried to come get his kazoo, so we went through another round of screaming on Colby's part.  I have to admit that I am proud of Dad, who did not scream or raise his voice at all during the 2nd round.  Back to the night, Dad put the kazoo in a locked closet (where many things Colby can not have go).  The 2nd round was worse than the first-  Screaming, throwing himself on the ground, trying to hit, etc,and it took both Dad and me to get him down the stairs, but we did make him go back to his room.  One thing we are learning is that we cannot give in-WE HAVE TO STICK WITH WHAT WE SAY!  If not, it reinforces that bad behavior.  It lets Colby think that he can do it again. 

Well, GOOD MORNING- today is a new day, and a new day means a new beginning here in Colby's Family.  Hope you all do have a Wonderful and Blessed Day!

A Very Obsessive-Compulsive Sunday

Obsession: the domination of one's thoughts or feelings by a persistent idea, image, desire, etc.

Compulsion: A strong, usually irresistible, impulse to perform an act.

And just for the record, I do not think that Colby has OCD.  I just think he has some OCD tendencies.

There are days, like today, that he is compelled by a single thought and urge to act on that thought.  Today's "THING" is using a different keyboard for my computer.  He has obsessed about the "white one" (never mind that it is actually silver) all day!  Why does he want to use the other keyboard?  WHO KNOWS!  Not Colby's Family!  He went as far as unplugging  it from the computer it goes to and tried to unplug my keyboard from my computer.  He became  very agitated when we said that he would have to wait until tomorrow to plug in the "White One".   But, if you know me, you know that my desk is a multitude of need-to-finish projects, paper work, school work, work-work, mail I need to look at, books, and probably many things that I just don't want to think about at the moment.  Needless to say, but plugging in a different keyboard is just going to have to wait until I clean off my desk.  That being said, I have already started cleaning so that tomorrow after school, Colby can plug in the "white one".

Well, I guess we will just have to see how the rest of the night goes, but after a small meltdown (small meaning it lasted less than 30 minutes), he seems content to leave the keyboard on the kitchen table and wait until tomorrow.  And hey, at least mom's desk is getting clean!

Bus Driver Forced from His Job???

You may read the article for yourself, and please do so before coming back to read my commentary!

The bus driver left a 3 year old boy on the bus, never mind that the child had autism...He left a 3 YEAR OLD on the bus.  Now he is being "FORCED" from his job, and I think he should be!  He did something worthy of being fired-plain and simple!  I do not like it saying that the bus driver is "Being Forced" from his job like he did nothing wrong. 

OK...I am off my soap box now!

Today is a Big Day

We are going to see Dr. Hollis (the psych) today with the Behavior Therapist (Miss A is what I will call her).  I am really excited that Miss A is going with us.  As an outsider, she can see things in a different light.  She does not have to deal with it all day, every day.  She is a professional, trained in this type situation.

She can also back me up when I tell the Dr. that the meds didn't work.  There was no change in Colby's behavior, and the meds made him lethargic during school. 

So, we will see how it goes and where we go from here. 

Mark Twain Said:

"Twenty years from now, you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do, than by the one you did do."


So, this is where Colby's family is at the moment. It has been a LONG week. We have had many rough days. Even though it was breaking our hearts, we considered that Colby would be best served elsewhere. Then, I came across this quote. I have never lived with regrets, and I am not going to start now. We have decided that until we have exhausted EVERY OTHER option out there, Colby is staying right here with us. 20 years from now, we will not regret not trying!

Has it been 13 Years Already???

Yes it has, and these creepy bugs are back!  Our yard is covered.  We all had a great deal of fun chasing the girls with them.  They actually ran into the house and locked themselves in the bathroom.  It is more fun than we should be allowed to have!  

Side Note to Mother's Day

As I was cooking dinner last night, Hailey asked me if there was 1 thing I could have for Mother's Day, even if no one could give it to you, what would that be.  "One day of normal" was my answer.  She wittily answered back, "That is impossible. You are not normal!  Besides, what is normal anyway?"  Good answer my sweet girl, VERY GOOD ANSWER!

What Do You Want for Mother's Day?

Someone asked me that the other day, and my only response can be, "What more could I want?"  I have 5 beautiful, healthy children.  I have a wonderful and very loving husband.  I have a roof over my head.  I have food in the fridge.  I have another healthy baby on the way.  What else is there really?

Sure, someone could bring me breakfast in bed, but I am up long before the rest of Colby's Family is. 
Sure, plants are nice, but I kill every plant I touch.  The rest of the family actually tells me not to touch the plants, dirt or water. 
Sure, there is jewelry, but in this family, not a good idea to wear too much.

So, that brings me back to my whole point...Having Colby's Family is enough for me!

Living Life One Moment at a Time

Because that is all we can do!  One moment, our day is going well, and the next, all hell has broke loose. 

I get that there are "triggers" to some of the behavior, but honestly, many times I can not figure out the "trigger".  Colby, sometimes, just seems to snap.  He says ugly things.  He lashes out at Colby's Family.  All we can do is pray over and for Colby. 

Today is one of those "Living One Moment At A Time" days!

Rough Days and No Understanding

Yes, I am venting today.  I lost my cool.  I admit that.  I am even going to say that it's OK.  I don't lose it very often when it comes to Colby, but today, I just had enough.

But actually, I am not writing because of that.  I am writing because I am about to lose my cool with all those people who think that they know what goes on in my life.  They think they know how it is DAY to DAY in this house.  They don't see the tantrums or the meltdowns over the what we perceive  to be little things (like bacon not cooked in the microwave. Which I hate!).

These same people think they know it all.  They think they know about my finances.  They think they know how much I pay in taxes.  I have even been told that I should, and they know my finances will allow me to, hire a cleaning lady. They think they know everything.  They even try to feed me lines of crap (A.K.A. LIES), thinking I am a moron.  I don't like it when people think I am stupid, and I dislike LIARS even more.

Yes, I am pregnant.  That means I am a lot more mouthy than normal.  And yes, I know...I am normally pretty mouthy.  So, you can take this to heart or with a grain of salt.  Pregnant or not, I still feel this way!

PS- For all of you who do know or don't act like you know- LOTS OF LOVE BEING SENT YOUR WAY!